Monday, October 15, 2007

I'm a Card-Carrying Library Card Carrier!

I went back to my Alma Mater this weekend to help plan my 5 year reunion. Even though it will really have been 6 years. My college was weird like that, and in a lot of different ways.

Dan and I were invited to a house party and served a mixed beverage that entails Keystone Light and Sunny D. And everyone freaking out and getting down to the exact same song we all freaked out and got down to back in the day. (For your listening enjoyment, I present you with that SAME song. So you can freak out and shake your booty. Like A Prayer)

I wandered around new buildings and old buildings and was comforted that the old smells were still there.

And, while looking for the Chinese department so I could say a hearty ni hao to my old profs, I accidentally stumbled into Kelly's office. Well, outside her office. I met her later for coffee. She gave me more books and Dan was not amused. :)

Do you know did amuse Dan? And myself? This:

I Am America (And So Can You!) by Stephen Colbert

[T]his book is for America's Heroes. And who are the Heroes? The people who bought this book. That bears repeating. People who borrow this book are not Heroes. They are no better then welfare queens mooching off the system like card-carrying library card-carriers. For the record, we're not offering this book to libraries no free rides.

For the record, welfare queen that I am, I got it at the library.

For those of you without a TiVo who like to go to bed a resaonable hour and therefore might not be familiar, The Colbert Report is a spin-off of The Daily Show. What Daily Show does to fake news, Colbert does to fake punditry. In a perfect send up of The O'Reilly Factor, Colbert offers biting social and political commentary in a way that frequently makes me want to pee my pants in laughter.

And now it's in book form. Reading much like Colbert's monologues (with margin notes that read a bit like an extended segment of "The Word") we get his faux-conservative thoughts on everything from Immigrants to Family, Sex, and Science. And it comes with stickers!

Parts of it, especially in the beginning, go on a bit long, but overall, it's pretty hysterical. I highly recommend it along with Jon Stewart's America (The Book).

And, some thoughts to leave you with:

Think books aren't scary? Well, think about this: you can't spell "Book" without "Boo!"

On why you don't need to take comparative religions? Jesus Wins

Why not take Women on Women: The Literature of Liberation? It's not what you think

"In the beginning, God created the heaven and the earth." Sorry, Darwin-huggers, bit it's not "In the beginning, a monkey evolutioned gay marriage."

Nothing is less American than the Army-Navy game. Whichever side you pick you're rooting
against our boys.


Sara said...

I just discovered Colbert's show about two months ago. His auction-my-cast bit was hilarious.

Jennie said...

I love Colbert! His book is hilarious.